Tag Archives: Relationships

Under Your Core Influence

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I always start the year by investigating what others have to say about the future human, economic, technological and socio-political trends. It’s fascinating how, according to the analysts, each year continues to be “one of the most significant years in world history”. Maybe it IS part of the human condition to want to continuously experience renewal and meaningfulness. Surely, 2014 must be more worthy than “just another year!” I, too, intend to have a new life in 2014. This year, I want to live free from fear of loss and embarrassment. I yearn for more youthfulness, humour, core connections, freedom and fun-filled creativeness. I intend to create this in my life and for those around me, regardless of what the world of economics throws our  Read the full article…

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Our Positive Power and Influence Program focuses on the use of personal, not positional power. Many people use their positional power in very productive ways. However, if the number one reason people leave their jobs is because of their bosses, it would indicate that people in positions of power do not use that power very effectively. We have traditional power relationships, like manager to direct report, but we also have power relationships with suppliers and partners. It is interesting to me that so many organizations give lip service to developing positive relationships with suppliers and win-win negotiations. The problem is that if procurement has specific objectives concerning money spent, and they are in a power position due to size, they still seem to act as  Read the full article…

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So much of what we do at work has to be done by, with, or through other people. It’s a fact of life. Relationships can be temporary, such as with an ad hoc team, intermittent, as with cross-functional project teams, and daily, as with either dotted or direct line reporting. Those relationships can be anything from antagonistic, to cordial, to a lot of fun, to close. Human beings are social creatures. We like to “hang out” with people we like! We tend to distance ourselves from people we perceive to be weird or different. Take my word for it, there are a lot of weird people out there! What we don’t think about when we’re reacting to one of these “weirdos”, is the negative impact  Read the full article…

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At birth, we began to express our personal needs to those around us, often very directly! While parents and relatives often complied because they were “supposed to,” a more subtle process was at work. At this early stage of our lives, we recognized that these important others felt rewarded by our smiles and felt unhappy or even punished by our tears. We built quickly on this fundamental discovery as our needs became more complex. We learned to state our likes and dislikes more clearly to support our demands. We discovered the value of bargaining and appealing to others’ personal needs in order to meet our own. We learned that it is not always necessary to give reasons for our needs, that it was possible to  Read the full article…

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According to Gallup, over 60% of employees either dislike or hate their jobs, and the most common reason is that they have narcissistic bosses.  So it should come as no surprise if you sometimes have trouble dealing with your boss. Just thinking about a high stakes salary negotiation, a sensitive year-end performance review, or having to deliver some kind of “bad news” to your boss can raise your stress level. It’s hard to be at your best in such situations. It will be a lot easier once you’ve crafted your influence strategy. Any time you need to influence upward, clarity is key. So prepare accordingly. First, get clear in your mind what’s working or not working, from your perspective, and what you hope or expect  Read the full article…

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The position of Project Manager is one of the fastest growing and most dynamic roles in organizations across all industries. It can also be the most demanding role. Much of the most important work in your organization gets done via projects. Personal and organizational success therefore rests, in large measure, on project success. The problem is, projects don’t always succeed. Even superbly qualified project teams may find themselves shackled by scope creep, resource depletion, lack of teamwork, or unexpected shifts in project specs. Strong project leaders steer their project teams clear of such obstacles. They skillfully interact with team members as well as key stakeholders to drive projects to their intended destinations, on time and within budget. Based on our research with over 30 project  Read the full article…

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Human beings are social creatures. We like to spend time with and do things for people we like.  We tend to distance ourselves from people who are “different”.  However, in the workplace we do not generally have the luxury of choosing the people with whom we work. That means that sometimes we have to develop a relationship with someone we don’t like for whatever reason: personality, different opinions, different thinking style, or they just look weird to us.   So many people have said to me: How do I build relationships?  This always seems like such a strange question, but it really is challenging for some of my more technically oriented colleagues.  I usually suggest taking some time to get to know the other person,  Read the full article…

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Influence skills can help you meet personal objectives and maintain or build positive working relationships-simultaneously. Your challenge as an influencer is to pursue your objectives while fostering the stability and growth of your working relationships. High-impact influence skills, style flexibility, and disciplined planning will help you achieve this balance between objectives and relationships in most situations. Achieving a balance between objectives and relationships may be difficult when you and the target have strong personal differences. Balancing task objectives with relationships is difficult enough when you and another person have competing objectives-a common occurrence. Maintaining this balance can be even more delicate when you and the other person have a history of personality clashes or deep interpersonal conflicts. Some working relationships may be so ruptured and  Read the full article…

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Training people to be behaviorally effective is important for reasons we can’t accurately measure but intuitively know – it increases productivity. We need to know that we are training the right people to build competence in the right skills. We need to know that what we are training people to do is in line with our business objectives. We need to have hardcore justification that we are not simply throwing dollars at the “flavor-of-the-month” training intervention. Today, we just cannot afford to waste money. It is important to make sure that the training is supporting the business. The ROI of not training people is immeasurable. Right now we need to be investing in the people we have decided to keep. These last few years have  Read the full article…

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Most companies seem more than willing to invest in their Information Technology (IT) function. And well they should. IT has repeatedly demonstrated that it can have a wondrous effect on a company’s productivity, ability to serve customers, and cost-effectiveness. A successful IT organization can deliver significant competitive advantage. Still, many IT departments have an Achilles Heel. And it’s not technological. It’s personal. Or, more accurately, interpersonal. IT professionals frequently struggle to interact effectively with line managers and others who use their services. The result?  Businesses realize far less value than they should from their IT investments. Increasingly, IT professionals are expected to function as “business partners” who work with line managers and users to cost effectively solve mission-critical business problems. Yet, those who lead IT  Read the full article…